England Will Win the Rugby World Cup.

I had this sudden sneaky feeling. If I was God, sketching out the plot, interested only in a great story, I might just choose England for my winner. England. A credible but hugely surprising outsider.

In the set up, I’d establish a fat red herring: New Zealand. They have to win. It’s obvious. Start of Act Two, I’d introduce another herring: Argentina. The midpoint would be a shocker: New Zealand fly home, and France is back in the game. Act Two climaxes with more astonishment. The final is to be England vs South Africa.

And then, the climax. The epiphany. And it’s “England, England”, lead by brave Sir John, with a pass to Robinson, that overcomes the Boer in the biggest game since the great war of freedom.

This is not what I want to happen. Just thinking plot here. In fact I’m going to invoke the Gods on our side.

De La Rey, De La Rey,
Sal jy die Boere kom lei?
De La Rey , De La Rey,
Generaal , Generaal,
Soos een man sal ons om jou val.
Generaal De La Rey.....

Hoor die Kakies wat lag.
n handjie van ons teen n heel groot mag,
en die kranse le hier teen ons rug.
Hulle dink dis verby,
maar die hart van n Boer
le dieper en wyer.
Hulle gaan dit nog sien

De La Rey, De La Rey,
Sal jy die Boere kom lei…

Lyrics and music by Bok van Blerk.

I'm going to look like a complete arse if we don't beat Argentina. And this has been World Cup of upsets...